“I’m Captain Jack Sparrow. Savvy?”
"Yes hello, I’d like to make a de-paws-it."
"My finances are not a fucking game, Jessica."
Do you see this?
Peeps Marshmallow Chicks do not accurately represent a real chick in any way.
They are shorter, they are unnaturally yellow, they have little dots for eyes.
If Peeps were actual real chicks, they would have serious health complications because they are made of sugar and gelatin.
Above all that, if a Peep chick wanted to walk, it could not. It would nosedive, because it has no legs or arms or actually any moving ligaments whatsoever.
I hope I inspired chicks everywhere with this message.
Remember, when you look in the mirror, it’s not you who’s ugly.
It’s society that’s ugly.
Today, I found a kitten sized chair and, luckily, I had a kitten to put in it.
a proper way to ask me out on a date